Teflon Lifestyle

Last week 1000 or so people died in South Sudan from Meningitis and another unidentified illness. Today a Sudan Airlines flight was hijacked in Chad. If these things were not reported in BBC, I would have no idea they were happening.

Anna's son Francis is visiting, He's been here a week and a half and leaves this Sunday. He's ace. We went with a group back up to the Pyramids, this time we camped overnight. Awesome trip out of the city despite waking up to sandblasting winds... now I know what frosted glass goes through. It's great to be a tour guide again. There is nothing like seeing your home through somebody else's eyes.

Themes of politeness, censorship (or restraint) and value still keep popping up in conversation and life. A strange incident last week got me thinking again. Anna and I had a party (to say goodbye to the coordinator who has quit - after being fired, to welcome three new volunteers and two new British council workers, to welcome Francis and just for the fun of it). a couple of the guests took offence to a Sudanese men's hat that was upside down on the ceiling (placed there by the previous occupants to hide ugly wires). I took great offence to people who don't live in my house deciding to take it down, not only without asking, but against my vocal objection to re-arrange my living room ... which also happens to be my bedroom. It was not my hat, it was not my decision to put it there but it was my space goddamit.

I think the reason why this stupid and not overly noteworthy action got to me in a tizz so much was because I feel I need to adapt so much to live here. I'm not just a westerner living in Sudan, I'm bisexual, pagan, non-virgin, wiccan, female, extroverted, dancing, polytheistic, tattooed, pierced, left wing, outspoken, freckled, unmarried, westerner living in Afro-Arab Muslim male controlled Sudan. I have to alter what I wear, what I say, how I think, how I behave, everything. Of course I do and this is why I came. But rewarding as it is, it is hard work. So I like to think of my home as my own personal Embassy (The Embassy of the Democratic Socialist Republic of Anchel). In my home I like to think I'm on my land, where I can just let my knees and shoulders and thoughts and beliefs and self expression all hang out. The one place that I'm not judged by Sudanese standards.

I was going to put the hat back up to reassert my right to maintain my small slice of the world (yes, I am a control freak, but you already knew that). However this morning I noted that Anna was using the hat as a jewelry box in her room. Ah, lateral thinking for the uses of local fashion in ones personal space wins. Goddess bless Anchel.

Ever since I got my passport back I feel I have my freedom, safety and security back. It makes me miles more comfortable. It's just a weight off my shoulders that are currently decently covered.