Melbourne is Fantastic!

After exotic and immense Persia, we spent a couple of nights in Dubai. The idea was that we would be in Tehran for the US election, but we found out the election results on the cool little personal TV screen on the Emirates flight into Dubai.

Tristam described Dubai as the Las Vegas of the middle east. I have never been o Las Vegas, but the description is apt. We hung out in malls, checked out the gold souk, marveled at what people can do and took a 'desert safari' which was a package deal that included driving over sand dunes, banquet meal, henna tattoo and a belly dancing show. Dubai is a great stop for a couple of days. It was cool to walk though a mall and see European shops butted up to North American shops. It was a novelty (the novelty was taken to the extreme when Tristam spent an hour skiing inside one shopping mall) I'm glad we went, I'm glad we I got to see it... next time I go I'll be sure to take more money.

Indy picked me up from the airport just after 3am (that's friendship), I lost a day flying back, The air in Melbourne was light and warm and smelt of fresh gum trees and Jasmine. Memories of normal stuff came flooding back, like letterboxes and a opossum sitting on a power line. Indy and Nareen had pitched a tent in their back yard for me, which meant I had my very own room and it was outside the house so I could sleep in when the kids woke up. That first night (early day) I fell asleep to the sound of the magpies and bell birds waking up and chirping. I thought it sounded just like R2D2 outside my tent.

Melbourne is brilliant. While I was there I stayed at 5 different peoples houses (that's an average of two nights in each bed). when you stay at another's place you get to have a wee peek into their life, just for a moment see what they are up to and what matters to them. I love it. I can also see why so many people emigrate to the Antipodes; the lifestyle, weather, food and attitude of the people is just better, more relaxed and sunnier. And might I add, in Edinburgh I didn't get to see as many people as I wanted to, even though I was there for 2 months. Melbourne was different people really made an effort to come out and find me when they found out that I was there. That felt good. (the important people in Edinburgh were awesomely hospitable of course)

I was expecting it to be quieter, but I had forgotten hoe raucous the Australian wildlife could be. I saw splendidly coloured parrots in trees in Melbourne city, kangaroos bouncing through an inner city park. For the weekend I got out to the bus and heard koalas grunting and grizzling. Emely kindly took me out to see her family, swim in a local river and raft where the platypus play (we didn't see any on this trip).

I finally got to catch up with Flic, (you may remember her from Uganda/Rwanda/Congo/Burundi)She is working hard in landscape gardening, she is chilled and ace, and every bit as awesome as the day I met her. Both she and her family bent over backwards providing me with food, pick ups and drop-offs, train tickets, internet, maps, laundry... everything that a traveller needs. I'm looking forward to getting settled into New Zealand so I can return the hospitality.

Out of all the places I have traveled to I think Melbourne is the most livable. I have a few friends there who have now made it their home. A lot of the people I used to hang out with 8 years ago now have houses and kids. It kind of feels like being in a sort of time machine, I went away and when I got back everyone had moved on, grown up. I'm still dealing with the little things that changed while I was in Africa (moving ads in the train stations - like Harry Potter pictures, and iphones, and google street view) its kind of strange to see friends in such dramatically different roles without getting to see all the little stages and developments that led them there. It's kinda weird, but mostly cool.

I just want to say hi to all those lovely people who took me out, showed me around, reacquainted me with Melbourne, met up for me for tea, gave me a place to stay, extended the warmest welcome and reinforced a friendship... you all have a place to stay with me, just as soon as I find a place: Indy, Nareen, Taj, Sage and Myrtle; Flic, Glen, Maryin, Philip, Charlie and Jack, Jen, Tim, Will and George; Emely and Danny; Tosie, Kiowa, Elaina, Annie and Mark; Anita, Amy, Bridget, Marcus, J'nel, Abby, Hawthorn, Selene, Shelia, Madeline and Cat.

I know for the rest of you, that was really boring, but those people are really very cool.

Leaving Iran

I’m typing this from a beautiful wooden table in Indy and Nareen’s kitchen looking out over their ecologically designed extension, awesome backyard and their lovely black dog sleeping in the shade. But before I got here we were in Iran.

There are two things that have made this travel experience really different this time. firstly travelling with a man in the middle east is wonderfully relaxing. I was hardly ever approached by anyone wanting anything, I got to contribute to conversations but never had to put in any ground work. When we were together men only spoke to Tristam, and women generally stayed away. Tristam was also approached for all decision making. I was thoroughly looked after for the whole trip, (I might add that Tristam booked all flights, delt with visas and did all that boring stuff I normally have to do y myself) bliss. The other thing that altered my experience was having an Ipod. I got an Ipod shuffle while I was in Sudan, but it wasn't till September that I got it to work. It was loaded up with some of my favorite music. I waited in the Turkey/Iran boarder queue listening to big band stripper music; I crossed the dry northern desert lands of Iran listening to Cabaret, Elvis, Kylie, Scott Joplin and banjo music; I walked down the streets of Tehran listening to All that jazz, and I approached customs in Australia with the theme from the Good the Bad and the Ugly playing in my ears. It really does change the experience.

I ended my last blog saying something about the roads in Tehran being notorious and Allah willing we’ll be ok. Well maybe Allah didn’t will it, maybe Allah doesn’t appreciate being referred to in the blog of an atheist, or perhaps even Allah exists. Tristam got hit by a bus in Tehran. He’s absolutely fine now, but I can’t imagine it was a pleasant experience for him.

Tristam had gone to the former American embassy to see if he could get some photographs of the anniversary of the day American hostages were released from the embassy building. It’s now officially called the “US den of espionage” It’s famous for its walls painted with anti-American images, and is seen the news when there is any US flag burning going on in the city. The street has 4 lanes of very fast traffic going in one direction… I say lanes, but that really just means that there are white lines painted on the road, I don’t mean to imply that the cars were in any sort of formation. The road also has one bus lane; the buses go in the opposite direction.

Tristam was hit on the shoulder and spent the rest of the afternoon in the hospital getting x-rays and such. I was blissfully unaware on the other side of town mulling about the shops and attempting to post packages. The most difficult thing I had to contend with that afternoon (well aside from not being able to post packages cause the customs man wasn't working that day) was the fact that for every women's clothing shop, there was about 6 men's fashion shops. I'm used to the ratio being inverse. with women draped in a black uniform, the men are the peacocks in Iran.

There is a saying in Tehran: if you hit a person with your car, you better drive back over them to make sure they are properly dead. The post-hitting-someone paperwork is pretty intensive. Our last day in Tehran was spent mostly in police stations and at the translators where Tristam made an official statement making no claim against the driver.

The final count of nose plasters seen was 12: 5 on boys and 7 on girls... that's a lotta nose jobs.

Postcards from the Axis of Evil

I'm on one of those crappy computers again, the kind that has already crashed 3 times, is even slower than my typing and where the space bar only works if you tap it hard on the right side at an angle of 45 degrees.

On top of that my email supplier (myway) have recently changed all there software so my email account is practically unusable. So with Facebook and Myspace banned I'm just going to leave a wee note till I should have full access in Dubai next week: Flic, Em and Indi can't wait to see ya, Indi I'd LOVE it if you could meet me at the airport in the early hours of the morning (Emirates airlines, EK404 from Dubai to Tullamarine Airport Arriving 0130, Sunday Nov 9... it stops somewhere along the way, I don't know where, and if I was a more superstitious person I would be concerned about my flight number being 404: internet code for dunno, can't find it).

Despite the bad computers Iran remains fantastic. It's really lovely here, really. The people are lovely, the architecture is incredible and the history is astounding. We are in a place called Yazd right now. I'll pop a map in so you can see. This place is said to have had a continuous settlement here for 7000 years. 7000! It was visited by Marco Polo and Alexander the Great.


Iran is full of surprises. Before I came, I knew if was beautiful from the lovely Persia Tourism ad campaigns we got on Arab satellite TV in Africa. And I knew it was one of those bad countries that the US want to bomb. I had visions of soldiers on every corner, crippling effects of sanctions restricting all forms of commerce, women draped in black scuttling away from view, gender segregation in every part of life, and problems with bureaucracy.

Nope, it's not like that at all. there are a few elements of truth in it though. some women do where a long black cape from there head, but faces are open and most women wear a combination of headscarf, a 3/4 length fitted jacket (they are awesome, I'm going to buy several before I leave, perfect length for business jacket or dress) and slim trousers - in fact hipster skinny jeans are popular here (and muffin tops are always hidden).

Also popular are nose jobs. So far we have seen 6 plastered noses (5 girls, 1 guy) and we haven't yet got to the nose-job capital; Tehran.

Her are a couple of pretty accurate examples I got from the web, I image searched "Iranian womens clothes" because "Iranian women's clothes" with the apostrophe was blocked by the government.



There is a bit of gender segregation. On public buses, the men occupy the front and the women the back. In shared taxis seating is arranged so that unrelated men and women are not sitting together. Only once has a hotel asked Tristam and myself if we are married when we checked in, and When Tristam answered no (I would have lied) it didn't appear to make a difference. We have always been given seats next to each other on long distance buses and I have not yet been kicked out of a men-only place like a tea-house or water-pipe place.

There is general discontent with the government. Many of the people we have spoken with (including even soldiers) voice their objections. They are are interesting in hearing our opinions... which are always reserved. They don't want to be seen as being the same as their government. This was a very similar point of view as in Sudan where they wanted it to be known that the decisions of their government were not theirs and didn't represent who they are, I'm sure many others can empathise (Americans). They seem patient to wait till the regime changes. No one wants blood.

So there are sanctions here. which for us means we can't use credit/debit cards or travellers cheques in the country. In theory it means Iran has no international trade with UN nations. In reality we can buy big purchases with all major credit cards (using an off shore account). And even though there is no McDonalds or Starbucks the place is awash with Coke, Pepsi etc (they have factories here and a copyright from before the restrictions) and enough local industries of fast food chains and local banks with ATMs that it doesn't seem to make that much difference to day to day life. Also there will always be someone who will buy their oil.

We are not the only tourists here. Every city we have been to (admittedly having only 18 days here we are hitting all the big ticket spots) we have bumped into loads of foreigners, mostly European. there was even one American (there are allowed in if they give a full itinerary of exactly where they intend to be, or if they go on a government tour). We've seen travellers by motorbike, push-bike, jeep and with loads of kids. There are also loads of internal tourists. It can be hard here to get a visa, and as Iran is so diverse and ideal for tourism many Iranians travel though there own country. Most surprisingly are the tour buses, huge groups of Dutch, French, German or New Zealand old people are herded around important sites.

Tonight we catch the overnight train to Tehran. The traffic there is said to be horrendous, already we have experienced some frightening examples of Iranian driving, it would have been hair raising if my hair was not flattened beneath my headscarf. Allah willing we'll be ok.